Stuart’s experience: Straightforward English vasectomy with a nervous wife!

“She Who Must Be Obeyed” and myself are both 35, with three boys under the age of 6. Late last year we decided that 3 was the right number for us and I made an appointment with my GP. When I said that I would like a vasectomy she was very understanding about it. We have a good relationship due to the number of times I’ve seen her (I have Crohn’s Disease), and she didn’t counsel me or anything, just said that she’d write to a colleague who performs the operation at a small-ops clinic next door. This was the week before Christmas.

Mid-January I received a letter giving a date of 9th February. I was asked to shave around my scrotum 5 days before and suggested that I wore tight underwear. Being just after Christmas I bought a few pairs of tangas a size smaller than I would normally have bought to ensure that nothing would swing in the breeze.

The vasectomy

On the day of the operation, I left work at lunchtime to the grins of my colleages. I got home and my wife asked if it’s what I really wanted to do. I think she was more nervous than me! I got to the doctor’s at 2:30 for a 2:40 appointment, and he was running late. I was finally called in at 3 pm. He went through the implications (permanent), the possible complications (reconnection, pain) and asked me to sign the form. We then went through to the treatment room.

So, there I was on the table with my trousers and pants around my knees, a good looking nurse watching on, and the damn doctor wants to talk about last night’s episode of E.R.! Mind you, it did the trick. When he put the needle in for the local it just felt like a scratch which quickly faded. About 5 minutes later he was finishing up the stitching and moving onto the right-hand side. During the procedure, the worst I felt was the scratch of the needle and a bit of tugging. Far worse was before it started when he was checking the lay of the vas and it felt like he was trying to do the vasectomy by crushing my balls.

3:30 – yes, 30 minutes after going into his office – I was being pushed out of the door with the sample jars and an advice sheet. A neighbor drove me home and quizzed me about what happened, and then I sat talking to my wife with a packet of frozen peas wrapped around my crotch.

After the procedure

It’s now two days after the operation, and I’m suffering no ill effects. The stitches sometimes catch, but that’s no worse that any other operation that I’ve had. I’m back at work tomorrow, and so far I’m not regretting the op.

One thing I have noticed is the number of men who own up to having had or are going to have, a vasectomy once it’s mentioned. Mostly it’s a taboo subject, after all, you’re getting your privates cut, but when the ice is broken then men seem to be happy to talk about it.

In some ways, it’s like when you get a new car. When you’re looking you feel that you’re going to be fairly unique. Once you’ve bought it seems like the model you got is everywhere. When I mentioned that I was going for the snip one of my work colleagues said he’d already been done. This morning I mentioned it to the regulars on the train and one of them got done 10 years ago, and another is going in March.

No trees were harmed in the transmission of this message. However, some electrons were mildly inconvenienced.

Submitted by Stuart

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