Hey all: I had a vasectomy done a week and a half ago. Used lots of ice, rested a lot, and besides one of the incisions not quite healing as expected, all went well. I summed up the experience in a series of haikus. Here ya go:
At long last I meet
The Doc who tells me its time.
Why have I waited?
He himself had it,
Welcomed me into the club.
Draws a detailed chart
The day comes too
soon,
I stay quite busy until
Time to go has come
Never shaved these
things
They see their first glimpse of steel
Cold, shining, hard, sharp
Five milligram tab
Valium will surely help
I like this calm dream
Greet nurse and chit
chat
Doc enters, wife leaves, I sigh
Shoes, pants off, robe on
Lie back relax now
Small talk, valium chit chat
snip snip poke tug tug
All done over with
Out to waiting room, smug smile
No regrets, dull ache
Films, television
La-Z-Boy and frozen peas
A bizarre three days
Snapshot memories
"Snip poke tug suture suture"
Veil of valium
Old Chinese Eunuchs
Carried their three jewels for life
To die as whole men
Told this to the Doc
He offered me my jewel-snips
But I'm fine as is
Those poor little
guys;
"Dad! Help! Can't find a way out!"
But it's for the best
Carlos Alden